I should have asked more questions, but I think that, if I had, I probably would have said ‘no’. I would have looked at the massive musical they were trying to produce, and at the tiny infrastructure of their organisation, and said ‘no’ when they asked me to direct it.
But I didn’t ask questions. I naively followed my excitement and jumped right in. Of course, if I hadn’t, I would have missed one of the toughest creative experiences of my life, one that taught me so much, including how creative people want to be part of something that requires them to be courageous.
Throughout the project I would have to find a choreographer and an acting coach, and replace the musical director three weeks before opening night. God, help me! Beautifully, these amazing creatives became collaborative relationships I have enjoyed on a number of projects since.
I lived in a constant state of stress, but here’s the thing - the entire team, of production creatives and cast, came together to build a show that the region embraced and eventually earned an Australia Day Award.
But, that first week. Good grief!
I spent rehearsals wearing a stupid expression of surprise as each challenge hit me in the face. I would drive home afterwards raging out loud to no one, purging the emotion I’d had to control in front of my cast. I kicked my little feet and beat my fists. Nothing was the way it was supposed to be. I strutted around the house, having imaginary conversations with people in my head. I solved no problems, I encouraged no one.
You know that moment when you’ve had your little tanty and you realise that the problem is no longer the problem; your approach is now the problem. At the end of week one I was there; bored with my raging, my whining, and trying to change things that were out of my control.
Group reflects leadership.
I’m a big believer that ‘group reflects leadership’. That means, as the director, I set the culture of a theatre project. That first week, I struggled to challenge myself and my unmet expectations. Fighting things out of our control freezes our problem solving ability, which in turn impacts the culture of the team, building an unsafe rehearsal space and stifling creativity. Aaaah! No pressure!
It’s amazing what happens when you let go. You remember that there is always more than one way to do anything. You begin to approach the project with a problem solving mindset and you remember that grace is a powerful thing. If my voice had to be the strongest one in the project, it had bloody well better be one that encouraged others rather than protecting my own ego.
This little theatre company did not have the organisational infrastructure to produce this massive musical but it had good people; people who, when challenged, found courage, creativity and joy in the idea that we would all have to do more than we expected.
It didn’t get easier. We had massive challenges right up to opening night but the atmosphere we all worked in, changed. They were fighting toward something they could sense could be wonderful. They were open. Their sense of humour buoyed us all and, most beautifully, they held each other up.
Opening night theatre foyers are full of relief, exhaustion, excitement, adrenaline, laughter, tears, pride and joy. There is also something hidden from the audience. A cord that connects every member of the project - especially projects that have been hard fought and won. An invisible cord, alive with every secret tear, fear, encouragement, trust, courage and an ‘understanding’ that can’t be explained. It’s only for us and when, at the end of the project, the cord releases us, the impact of it remains.
Cue the Hans Zimmer score.
Group reflects leadership.
You can create a culture of fear, mistrust and apathy or you can encourage one that releases each individual to be creative, adventurous and connected, but it requires leadership free of ego and full of grace.
No pressure.
The best you can do is all you need to do!
Sherryl-Lee Secomb writes her blog, An Idiot On Stage, specifically to encourage and equip community theatre to expect more and be extraordinary. Sher has been building brands for performing creatives in Australia since 2011 and now advises theatre organisations and performing artists in marketing their work and building awareness of their brand.
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